Oh, honey, you wanna know who won the pole for the NASCAR race today? Well, lemme tell ya, these young fellers drive so fast, it makes my head spin faster than a chicken with its head cut off. But I heard it was that Kyle Larson fella. Yeah, that’s the one. He was faster than all the others, just barely though.
These NASCAR things, they go round and round. Makes me dizzy just thinkin’ about it. All that noise and those fast cars, I tell ya, it ain’t like the old days. Used to be we’d race our old beat-up trucks down the dirt road. Now that was racin’!
That Kyle Larson, he won that pole thing, whatever that is. Some fancy word for being first in line, I reckon. He beat some other feller, Ty Gibbs, I think his name was. Just by a smidge. Like the difference between a gnat and a fly. Not much at all! They say it was just one-hundredth of a second. Now, what do they know about a hundredth of a second? I tell ya, these young folks and their fancy measurements.
Used to be, we just knew who was fastest by who got to the finish line first. Simple as that. No need for all these fancy gadgets and gizmos. Now they got all these TV cameras and folks hollerin’ and yellin’.
- Kyle Larson, that’s the pole winner.
- Some race in Chicago, I heard.
- Fast cars and loud noises.
This one time, there was this other fella, Joey Logano. He’s a big shot, won a bunch of these NASCAR races, they say. Couple of times even! A real champion, they call him. Sounds like a big deal, don’t it? He’s won more than his fair share, that’s for sure. Won a race by pushin’ past some other driver near the end, I heard. Smart fella. And a good friend, that Ryan Blaney, helped him win another. Good to have friends, I always say.
Anyway, this Joey Logano, he was racin’ against some fella named Daniel, and he got in front of him with just a few laps to go. Like stealin’ candy from a baby! Then he held on tight and won the whole dang thing. Good for him, I say. He must be a real good driver, that Joey Logano. Must have a good heart, too, winning all those races. They say he’s won three of them championships now. That’s more championships than I got chickens in my coop, and that’s sayin’ somethin’!
They got all sorts of names for these races. One’s called the YellaWood 500. Sounds like somethin’ you’d find in the woods, don’t it? And this one was in a place called Talladega. Never been there myself, but it sounds fancy. This Michael McDowell fella won the pole there. They’re always winnin’ poles at these races.
And that Joey Logano, he’s always in the thick of it. He won another big race, beatin’ that Ryan Blaney fella. They work together, but I guess sometimes they race each other. Must be hard, racin’ against your friend. But they both did good, that’s what matters. Joey Logano sure is somethin’, winnin’ all the time like he does.
Then there is this other guy named Martin Truex Jr. Heard he’s gonna start first in some big championship race. They call it the pole position. Must be important to start at the front. Like being first in line at the pie social. You get the first pick!
And that Joey Logano is there, too. Always there! He came in second in this one. They say he was the best of the Championship 4. Sounds important. Like the top four kernels on a cob of corn! He even won some big race at a place called Phoenix. And he won the championship, too! Beatin’ that Ryan Blaney again. They sure do race each other a lot. Must be fun, but tiring. Like chasin’ chickens all day.
These NASCAR fellers, they sure do love their racin’. Reminds me of the county fair, ‘cept with faster cars and bigger prizes. It’s a whole different world than what I’m used to, that’s for sure. It sure seems like that Kyle Larson and Joey Logano are the ones to watch. Always winnin’ somethin’. They must be livin’ the high life, those two.
Well, I gotta go. My biscuits are probably burnin’. You young folks have fun watchin’ those races. Just be careful out there, and don’t drive too fast. Unless you’re Kyle Larson or Joey Logano, I reckon. Then you can go as fast as you want!
